This one's been in the bag for years. Tried to share it with the world a couple years ago but the video straight bombed. Told myself, "They weren't ready for that one."
(Honestly a decent Move right there. Instead of facing the facts and admitting, "Hey, maybe my content isn't that good." Just blame it on your audience. Get a C on some paper, "Teach wasn't ready for that one." "I'm before my time Mr. Stevens! You'll see! YOU'LL FUCKING SEE!!!!")
The Vicious Bite stems from eating in the trenches, school lunch tables. The weekday banter that would go down between classes... Unmatched. If I could bottle that energy up, shit I'd be a wealthy man. Cheap lunches, rich vibes, dumb jokes, sharp comebacks. Peak.
For those 30-45 minutes you got to see what you were made of. Joke falls flat, buckle up. Fib a little during a story, immediate interrogation. Forget where Steve Francis went to college, pain.
One of the worst things that can happen during a lunch table sesh is sharing a long story and it completely bombing.
You know, one of those, "Had to be there..." stories. Nothing worse man I swear. Just ending a story and feeling those unsatisfied gazes rain down.
I unfortunately have tons of experience in regards to absolutely killing the vibe and spirit of a room. Shooters shoot man, what can I say. So now when I start feeling the air tighten up, I just stop talking. "It's a dumb story. Honestly not worth finishing."
You'll get egged to finish your stupid little story and just as you predicted, it bombs. "Told you dude!"
Back in the day I didn't have that feel. So I'd bomb and just sit there like a loser. Self conscious eyes, bracing myself for a heckle. Pathetic.
Then one day I witnessed my cousin tell an absolute dud of a story, complete vibe killer. Instead of sitting there like a vulnerable puppy awaiting a quip from the peanut gallery, he went ahead and took the biggest bite of a sandwich I've ever seen. Everyone laughed. Was fucking genius.
Ever since then I’ve always had this Vicious Bite Move in the back pocket. Works every time. Legit, I might be batting 1.000 with this bad boy. Can't recommend it enough.
Yeah, there might be a world where you go 0/2: no laugh on the story, no laugh on the bite… In that case, fuck the people you associate yourself with. They're just haters at that point.
The Vicious Bite. Could Be The Move.
- Bobby D